We all know the drill.
Work, work, work, stare at the computer, {insert caffeinated beverage of choice here}, manage relationships, handle chores, weed through traffic (lots and lots of traffic), more relationship business...and then after all that, the flickering moments of downtime.

The real question I was recently faced with was,
"the downtime I keep taking, is it the real kind of downtime I need?"

It’s a tough question. Like most, my little downtime comes after work and before bed. For years I had a fairly strict workout routine that kept me focused, but tired. Now, I still workout, but I've relaxed my mindset to be more forgiving. I workout after work, but not every day as before. As of late, it's been a bit more couch and TV. Not the best balance, but it’s a place where I can mindlessly numb out. I’ve been craving more experiences but lacking in execution. Why am I not incorporating more hobbies that I once loved OR finding new ones to expand my cranium? Going beyond Klean-Slate, beyond my job and beyond the alluring couch.

On weekends, I play extrovert more often than not. I love it, but lately, I've been stretching myself thin and not listening to what it is I may really need. Yoga used to center me. It was my retreat and I believe, someday, when I get back to the mat it will balance me again, but until then I can't look at it as my source.

So what is it I need? Or at the very least, what is it that I have to do to find the balance in my daily life that allows me to feel less anxious, less dependent and/or less frustrated. A place I’m not constantly in, but I place I find myself in currently. I need to re-connect to find out what it is I need.

Welcome, Santa Barbara. A beach town that is close enough for a quick escape, but far enough to make the city feel like a distant memory. I love my hometown, but LA is a city where you easily can get lost in the daily grind; where you forget that your mind and body need more. Scratch that, your mind and body DESERVES more. It needs outside stimulation beyond numbers, computers and traffic.

When it came to my Santa Barbara Re-Connecting Trip, all I knew was the hotel I wanted to stay in. On my last trip, I stayed at the Hotel Santa Barbara–right on State St. It was accessible to everything and the rooms were comfortable–light colors, minimal clutter and a jumping-on-bed feel. The hotel itself doesn't offer too many amenities (spas, restaurants, etc), but that's what being centrally located is for and as much as I would have loved to have indulged in a fancy spa, I wasn't on this trip to break the bank.

For my stay, a few rules I enforced:
Pay no extra attention to organizing (Virgo)
Don't worry about cleaning up (not in a rude way, that's not who I am, but take a step back and enjoy not cleaning an apartment for just a brief moment)
Don't fuss, make sure you are completely comfortable in your sleeping arrangements.

So that was that; done and booked. My first instance of empowerment all week long. Before beginning my road trip, a fantastic opportunity popped up and I decided to incorporate it into my "Re-Connecting Trip". A photo session with the one and only, BEETXBEET for a few new tees. Not something I do often, so this was an exciting adventure in itself. Liberating!

Post shot, I was driving away from LA with a smile on my face. From there I pit stopped at Erewhon Market Calabasas for a bit of road trip lunch fuel and a few goodies.

For lunch I made a hefty, delicious, overly priced sandwich. It was filled to the brim with avocado, tomatoes, sprouts, cucumbers, Vegenaise and vegan basil pesto on rosemary sourdough bread. I was starting my trip with a hearty bang.

After downing the sandwich, I made my way North through heaps of traffic to hit Santa Barbara 1.5 hours later. I dropped my stuff in my room, jumped on the bed and headed out. No plan, just walking.

The room was just right. Old school elegance.

Instead of power walking (as I do), I took more time to access if anything was drawing me in and as luck would have it, I stumbled upon the Salt Cave.

As you descend down, a store, a spa and a large Himalayan mineral, relaxation cave await you. If you think I hit the jackpot, you are correct. As I roamed the store, one of the sweetest employees gave me the rundown on this mom and pop shop (you can see on my IG video below) and the secrets behind the ancient salt. I was also amazed to learn that the Himalayan salt in the store and in the cave was approximately 200 million years old! The incredible healing benefits you can receive from the salts:

Regulating the water content throughout your body
Promoting healthy pH balance in your cells, particularly your brain cells
Promoting blood sugar health and helping to reduce the signs of aging
Assisting in the generation of hydroelectric energy in cells in your body
Absorption of food particles through your intestinal tract
Supporting respiratory health
Promoting sinus health
Prevention of muscle cramps
Promoting bone strength
Regulating your sleep -- it naturally promotes sleep
Promoting vascular health
In conjunction with water, it is actually essential for the regulation of your blood pressure
Assisting in replenishing electrolytes
Assisting in alkalizing the body and preventing excess acid

To learn more about the plethora of benefits read here.

I took a 45 minute, self-guided meditation class.

From being able to walk on it like sand to looking up and having hundreds of pounds lie overhead; the whole cave was encapsulated with salts. It was breathtaking.

As I hunkered into my zero-gravity chair with my cozy blanket, I proceeded to shut my eyes and listen to the delicate music playing overhead; letting the moment sink in while the world slipped away.

Not an easy feat for someone with a wandering mind.. Even if I could not stop the wandering (where are my yoga teachings at?!), I was still more present and in the moment than I had been all week long. I was sitting in a "cave", surrounded by crystals, listening to meditative music and breathing minerals in one deep breath at a time. I was right where I needed to be.

This set the mood for the rest of my walk up State St. I was now more relaxed and settling into my adventure with ease. Wherever I landed next was yet to be determined, but it was OK.

I continued walking, stopping into shops that interested me until I hit the end where the shops ceased to continue and suburbia began.

On the way back down, I crossed the street deciding I was going to head to the beach to watch the sunset.

While passing cute shop after cute shop, my head did a double-take as I passed a storefront glittered with colorful canvases. My body automatically stepped inside and I discovered it was an art studio class called The Painted Cabernet. A drinking and painting art studio class!

BACKSTORY (you can skip on to the END OF BACKSTORY if this doesn't interest you)
I grew up painting. It started with my obsession for coloring books and then recreating my mother’s sketches (faces and beach landscapes mostly). Then I moved into taking studio art classes after school. From there I was fortunate enough to have a space in my home that allowed me to paint; it was my safe haven. Throughout high school, I was a part of the AP Studio Art class where I was introduced to digital art programs like Photoshop. There I learned about mixing words with art and I became enthralled with recreating movie posters the way I saw them. It was the beginning of me learning about mixed media and the world of advertising.

I stopped painting regularly after we moved. Even with our new home and the painting area we created, the creativity in the painting arena just didn’t flow the same. I became increasingly analytical of my work and began losing passion. I still maintained my love for art history and I still ended up at an art school for advertising, but when it came to painting, I left it in the past. I thought about it often and imagined I would pick up a paintbrush again, but never did.

Over the years, individuals tried to get me to paint again, but I always found a way to brush it off. It finally got to a point where 10 years had passed since I had completed a painting! My nerves had gotten the best of me and the criticism of myself as a painter stayed. This past Christmas something changed. I dusted off the easel, paints and canvases I still lugged around from apartment to apartment. I went to Blicks for the first time in years to pick up the rest of what I needed to begin. Even roaming the aisles and musing over paints, brushes and supplies was a comfortable old feeling that I didn't even realize I missed.

When I got back, I spent most of the holiday break painting and listening to the same music I painted to in high school.
END OF BACKSTORY

Soooo needless to say, stopping into The Painted Cabernet was a welcomed surprise and I signed myself up for the class that started in 15 minutes.

A theme for the class is picked ahead of time and the non-conformist in me had to ask if I could choose another painting to tackle. I'm a fairly detailed, structured artist and all I wanted to do was something abstract. Something that allowed me to let loose and during this reconnecting trip; I had to listen to what my heart was saying.

I had a blast! The music was spot on and the wine hit the spot. I felt liberated enough to let my strokes flow without too much constraint. The class was everything I needed it to be and with that, my LIGHT BULB went off. One of my takeaways was painting. I needed to bring back painting into my life more than it was. I needed to attack more paintings with less constraint and I needed to try a new medium (acrylic) to make the concept of painting in my apartment easier.
It felt empowering to know this was one of my needs.

From the high of learning this valuable piece of information, I made my way to Galanga Thai (Thai food is my comfort food) and I ordered takeout Pahd See-Yew to close out the evening. Ending the night exactly how I needed and wanted. No bar, no club, just me.

The next morning, I walked down to the beach and enjoyed a quiet moment. Taking in the sounds, the people, the amazing sea breeze and the gentle heat of the sun. I soaked it up until I was ready to check out.

A friend of mine, Sayward (Bonzai Aphrodite) lives in Santa Barbara. We only get to see each other at LA events mostly, as I'm never in Santa Barbara and she is rarely in LA. By chance our schedules aligned and we were able to grab lunch before I left town at Mesa Verde–a spot on my "Santa Barbara Must Try" list.

Mesa Verde is a beautiful, organic, vegan/vegetarian, restaurant with a menu that radiates. It's the type of restaurant you would picture to be in the Santa Barbara landscape.

On this day, I ordered the Potato Latkes with tempeh bacon, avocado, dijon, cornichon, pink lady apple and pea tendrils.

Not the easiest dish to eat, but Jengas always been a fun game. It was absolutely delicious and beautifully plated

After lunch, I decided to head back and beat the traffic. Of course, a weekend never feels like enough, but having just that was everything. Listening to my mind and body was essential. I wasn't paying close enough attention until it all came to a head. Lesson learned, pay more attention to how I'm feeling and what I'm needing. I. No one else, just I. Supporting others is incredibly important, but if I'm not feeding myself correctly, the rest will inevitably fall and I'll be helping everyone else, but myself. Not a healthy balance.

In the end, bringing the weekend into my daily life is going to be key. I can have a great weekend full of awesome activities and experiences, but if my 5 days a week feel like a juggling act and I'm losing parts of myself, then I can do a better job of managing/balancing.

At the same time, beating myself up over trying to find the perfect balance can cause anxiety while letting it naturally happen can be daunting. The only thing I can do is try to listen. Try to incorporate what I need to make me feel whole.

Learn what yours are so you can be prepared to navigate those situations where instead of them wrecking havoc, they barely make a peep. I swear, learning to randomly smile helps. Trust me. I've been working on that more lately and its true. As well, deep breathing (Pranayama Breathing) has been key to helping me with my anxiety. Here is some good information about it in the Yoga Journal. As well, an app called Headspace is an easy, step by step, meditation app that helps for those with busy schedules.

Life is more than the daily grind and the daily bills. Take time to reconnect with yourself. It can help you build a stronger relationship with yourself and with the ones you love.

The video below is my IG story from the trip.